My Journey Through Postpartum and Life After I Kicked It's A$$!!!

Tag Archives: humor

"The Cart with the Car"

They need to build this monstrosity better… It was a workout!!!

What once was a leisurely activity of perusing aisle after aisle at my own pace… has now turned into a strategic, goal oriented mission.  Taking a toddler to the grocery store poses many challenges, for me at least.  First and foremost, it’s this cart!!! The one with the car!!! Why???? Why does it have to be at the front of the store????  Why, I ask???  In plain view, so you can’t even lie to your kid saying… “oh no babe, it’s not available today!!! Rats.”  Haha.  I’m a small girl.  It takes brute force to maneuver these bad boys through crowded aisles.

Yesterday was no exception.  Just the sucky part was I was sore as heck from my run.  After literally going through every aisle looking for quinoa… I just wanted to plummet to the floor and weep.  Like a cranky, whiney baby.  I wanted to shake and stomp my legs and just let out a wail.  I was just exhausted.  I wanted to hang my head and just sob.  And sob loudly.

Not only was my body sore, I had my little munchkin spilling things in the car, so I had to bend up and down numerous times.  I had to continuously tell her to keep her head and arms in the car.  I had to stop the cart every time she wanted to “look” at something.  While I love my grocery shopping experiences with her, yesterday was an entirely different experience.

I love the laughs I got from the men in the store.  The comments, “oh that looks like a lot of fun.”  Really?  “Then, why don’t you push this beast while I walk pleasantly next to you without breaking a sweat.” (That of course was my own internal dialogue with my irritable hamster running wild). There are the sweet, understanding people who just give you that look like… “girl, I feel you.  Been there.  Done that.”  A nice, super buff guy was like… “wow, I feel you.  I have to do that with my son.  It’s hard.”  It’s comedy when you think about it, but going through it was agony yesterday. I don’t know how many times I bumped into something.  And the best part… when I got stuck like Austin Powers in the aisle because I put the cart horizontally.  So here I am trying to squeeze past the handle and the shelf while trying to get the cart to turn around!!!  Ahahahahahahaha.

You can tell too… the people with kids and without.  The ones with kids…they smile and move out of the way in sheer empathy and comradery. The ones without… eye roll.  Stand until YOU MOVE.  Wth.

Anyways, all this was for the sake of making a new dish my BFF with four kiddos told me about.  A healthy hamburger steak.  I know.  You hear HAMBURGER and think how can this be healthy.  Well, we put in QUINOA (took me on a mission to find), kale, spinach, shallots, carrots, and celery.  I always use organic meat and the leanest possible.

Here’s the result of all my effort while I maintain an inkling of sanity!!! It was delish!!! The best part… O just gobbled it up without knowing how many veggies were inside.  The white leafy vegetable is white kimchi… made by my mom.  O has now ventured to eat peanut butter sandwiches and white kimchi.  Hooray.  So now, lunches are getting easier to make.

Hamburger Steak Dinner

The picture doesn’t justify how tasty this meal was… It was simple and just so yummy.

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***(I do not take lightly if anyone has been attacked by a real life chimpanzee or any animal for that matter… )!

This is me… being attacked by my 3 year old!!! I thought she turned into a rabid animal for a short while!!! I feared for my life!!! 🙂

I took my daughter to get a professional haircut because she has a picture day coming up at school. I had been refraining as the first two experiences had been anything but joyful… memorable in the most horrific way, yes… joyful… no. NO. No. NOOOOOO!!! So I thought, well… she’s older now. She can do this. I can reason with her. Yes, she is 3.5… but I for sure thought I could reason with her. I thought… “Oh, I will take her to those cool places with airplane and space shuttle seats.” But nope.

When we got in there… she dug her little claws into my arms and wrapped her legs around my waist as if the floor were on fire. Like she was a small cougar, climbing up a tree for safety. It was painful. It was embarrassing. It was a test of my patience. And it was just plain unenjoyable. But I did give myself a pat on the back for not losing my cool. Whew.

The crappiest part… her hair freaking turned out no better than when my mom or I gave her home cuts. So, minus $30 dollars, some skin off my arms, and my sanity… I still had to come home and cut her hair myself. Not only did her hair come out shorter than I (or she) wanted, it looked like she asked for Moe’s bang from Three Stooges. I’m excited for her Picture Day. NOT!



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Future leaders of the world! - Celeste

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