I’m not a creative mom. No, let me rephrase… creativity is not my forte. I’m not one of those imaginative moms who can build skyscrapers out of nothing. I don’t knit. I don’t sew. I can draw at an elementary school child’s level. But I’m a beast in the kitchen (in a good way), but I don’t know how to incorporate a child into my kitchen, partly from the fear of her getting hurt; but more because I like to get things done, so having a small child in the kitchen while I cook is a bit of a distraction for me. I like to be clean, strategic, and quick while I cook. So now, I’m trying to let go of my OCD tendencies and have her help me a little. Of course being the responsible parent that I am, I’m not letting her use a Henkel knife to chop vegetables yet. Why? Because, I’m saving that for next year. A kid has got to have something to look forward to, right? Ahahahahhaha.
I’m trying to learn new innovative ways incorporate O into my daily routine so I can expose her to new experiences and hopefully peek her interest with new activities other than walking around a mall with me buying shoes and clothes. She’s already a pro at that. (That of course is one of my favorite past times.). I’m up for ideas, so please feel free to suggest some “no fuss” fun.
Before, I would crucify myself for not being a more hands-on mom. Not having the energy to do arts and crafts… well, that’s not true… It’s not that I didn’t have the energy, I will be honest… I was just lazy. I’m sure I could have Google searched DIY arts and crafts, but that would entail having to go to the store to buy the materials and actually exerting energy to do it with my child. Ahahahahaha. During what I like the call the “Dark YEARS of Postpartum,” it was truly an insurmountable task for me. It really was a vicious cycle, because I would feel guilty that I wasn’t engaging her enough and it would make me crawl into a whole even more. I’m sure anyone who has experienced postpartum can empathize with me.
What I now realize is… I don’t have to be a great artist, singer, or dancer for her. I just have to be there for her by conversing with her, drawing with her, singing with her, dancing with her… even if I’m not the best. To her, I’m super cool right now (at least I think I am :p), but I won’t be cool for much longer, so I just need to give myself a break. But more than that, I need to also make the sacrifice of getting out of my own comfort zone and start getting out and experiencing new things with her. I realized too it helps to have a mom with you who has a child nearly the same age as your own. I really underestimated the power of a playdate because O was pretty non-social until she started going to school, but boy do I regret not having more playdates. I feel like I made motherhood much harder on myself than I had to.
The best thing I did or stopped doing was trying to be another mom I admired. I am who I am right now. I am, however, a work in progress… so my hope is that I do evolve into the mom I want myself to be.
Here is something O and I enjoy doing together: We love recording videos of us being silly… it takes no effort and the rewards are bountiful. We record short snippets of ourselves and then at night while we lay in bed, we watch and share the memories. It’s great too because our extended family gets to reap the rewards of our Academy caliber performances.