As a parent, I feel like I’m always scolding my child to do what I want them to do and what I feel they need to be doing. I constantly question whether or not my parenting skills are detrimental to O’s growth in all realms. What I question the most though and almost daily is whether this kid still understands the magnitude of love I have for her. I feel like I’m the mean, tyrant mom most days. Some days, I have to remind myself she’s three years old and needs to make mistakes and be free… (I was very carefree because my sister really did a great job at guarding me from the world).
I was looking at some home videos my husband had recorded from when O was a crawler to very recently. It was nice. The videos reassured me at how much I loved her and cared for her… more days than not. I think I’m always going to be my own worst critic when it comes to her, so I’m trying just to embrace it while having faith that she will know how much I love her even through the scoldings and my impatience.